Life Update: House, School, Anti-Depressants, Social Media
Woo- I needed that step back from long form writing after that last blogpost. That one was a doozy talking about starting therapy, my mental health struggles, and crossing the halfway point of my FNP program but I am overwhelmed the love and support I received in the comments and in my DMs. Thank you for reminding me that I am not in this journey alone.
Today, I wanted to share a life update, not because anything crazy happened, but because I miss blabbing on and not worrying about having a caption/story that’s too long on Instagram. I mean, I document the ins and outs of my life every single day on Instagram, but for some reason that still feels like it’s not enough. Can you believe I’m in introvert? Lol.
Home
So in terms of house updates, we got some awesome shelves from Floyd! We’ve been on the hunt for the perfect place for our record player, Caleb’s vinyls, and my plants but never found anything that we loved until Caleb saw these shelves on West Elm and we bit the bullet! Kind of an impulse buy, but at the same time, when you know you know.. you know? We had to buy directly from the Floyd website though because our order was kinda unique/funky because of our TV placement and living room size. We got 2 tall base shelves and 2 short extensions with 1 cabinet add-on for the perfect fit. We also installed grow lights from Amazon under 3 shelves on each side and they make them look so fancy schmancy, yet also brightening up the place and also, of course, mimicking sunlight for my plant babies!
I recently kinda lost that passion and love I had for plants when my depression and anxiety were at an all time high, but I’m noticing that I’m enjoying taking care of my plants again. That’s a good feeling. I’ve also had such a blast styling the shelves and although I probably drive Caleb crazy by moving 1 little thing every 5 minutes, I love it. Here’s some of the decor I got!
We’re also getting ready to replace all of our windows. If you’ve been around since we first bought this house 2 years ago, you may recall me saying that our windows are single-pane. which means it’s not as energy-efficient, safe, or pretty. So we finally may go for it this summer depending on how much of a discount or financing we can get since they are not cheap to replace all at once! But in terms of aesthetic, who knew that black windows were so much more expensive that white ones!? So after talking and thinking about it, Caleb and I decided that we really only care about having black window frames in the front of the house and it doesn’t matter if the other windows are white.
Also, we are finally fencing in our backyard and side yard! Maybe we were bold to think that our Australian Shepherd puppy, Pepper, would be okay to be let out without a leash, but after having her escape and sprinting all around the neighborhood and us having to chase her, we decided to prioritize that so she and Louis can hang out in the yard without us worrying about them running loose and us being the talk of the neighborhood!
School
This semester is weird! I’m taking Women’s Health and Research Foundations and Methods, so it’s definitely lighter in workload than last semester. I originally had a hard time finding a Women’s Health clinical, and I know you must be like, wait, don’t you work in OB? Well - finding a clinical site was hard in the first place because my school requires students to find them on our own, but then adding COVID to the mix was just a headache, especially now that we aren’t really sure what the next few months will look like. So I initially was super excited to learn from a midwife who I adore that I work with, but their practice recently decided that they wouldn’t be taking students in clinic. So I panicked and put out a question box on IG stories, and my now preceptor took me in!
My preceptor is a Women’s Health NP, and if you’ve followed me since my nursing school days, was the route I originally wanted to take! I’ve learned soooo much from her already at 4 weeks in, and this rotation is reminding me that my passion truly does lie in women’s health. I was so excited to see the clinic side of things prior to patients coming to me at the hospital ready to have their babies, but this clinic is a gynecology only clinic which I actually love! We see patients anywhere from menarche to menopause, and counsel on contraceptives, abnormal uterine bleeding, a ton of annual exams, PCOS, adenomyosis, and colposcopies etc.
My preceptor is such a great NP and is both thorough with her patients, but also super efficient and succinct, which are some characteristics I hope to embody when I’m an FNP. She also has a similar teaching style to me where she quizzes me, talks me through procedures and scenarios, and helps me critically think without making me feel stupid or inadequate. She also lets me do hands-on things to get comfortable with procedures and so I recently inserted my first IUD!!! I’ve been doing the breast, pelvic, bimanual exams and pap smears which has been great for my experience, though that is something I did a lot of just because of the patient population at my last clinical site. I’m learning so much about endometriosis, adenomyosis, hormone replacement therapy, and HPV.
I’m also still working as a graduate research assistant (more info on this here) and it’s been getting a lot busier as we enroll more participants into our small feasibility study. This requires 8 hours of my time/week which is honestly hard to do with my schedule + clinical + work, but honestly it’s so worth it because this position comes with a full tuition waiver and a stipend. So although it’s difficult for me to find those 8 hours a week, it’s honestly my saving grace not only because I’m not stressed about paying for school, but also because I am interested in nursing research and possibly pursuing my PhD over DNP in the future.
Mental Health
Ah. Mental health. The topic of my past year, as well as the topic of the year for all of us collectively, thanks to Covid. The situation that triggered my need for therapy and anti-depressants is still ongoing, but I’ve learned to set boundaries and cope a bit more. I’ve moved on from Prozac (fluoxetine) to Wellbutrin (bupropion) after 2 months of playing around with dosage and not really liking the numbness it brought me, as well as the jaw clenching in my sleep that had my jaw writhing in pain every morning. Here’s a study I found in regard to SSRI-induced bruxism some of you may find interesting!
I switched to Wellbutrin XL 150mg about 2 months ago and I have found that it has helped me. Now, has it changed my life and got rid of all of my sadness and mood swings? No. But is it better? Yes. I attribute this to starting talk therapy first with my counselor, and then adding in medications into the mix after that. I did learn that my depression is more prevalent than my anxiety, which is why my psych NP was comfortable with me switching to Wellbutrin since it can heighten anxiety from what I learned in school!
Social Media
In terms of social media, I have been loving challenging myself with video content. I made it a goal for myself to create more video content this year and I’ve had so much fun recently making Tiktoks. Tbt to when I used to scoff at Tiktok - are you following me!? I’m OBSESSED now and Caleb and I get in bed the nights I’m not working to watch Tiktoks for like 2 hours lol.
I’ve sort of slowed down on sponsored content just because quarter 1 is typically a slower month for influencer marketing, but I’m super grateful for the brands that I’m an affiliate for, such as Clove, for making up for this. I recently put aside $1000 of a commissions I made as an affiliate in March to donate to a cause I believe in! I haven’t decided on one yet, but as soon as I choose one, I’ll let y’all know.
I also have a super exciting project in the works that I can’t wait to share with you all. I know some of you hate when influencers tease projects, but I just can’t handle it and need to tell someone!
I’m also going to continue to do random giveaways because I really am so grateful for all of your support and love whether it be in the form of likes, comments, shares, DMs or blog visits and I just want to give back to y’all!
If you’ve made it this far, thank you! I’d like to focus more time on the blog in 2021, too. Not trying to overcommit, trust me - I just like being able to word vomit and honestly, it’s therapeutic for me, too.
xo,
Clara